How To Talk To Your Doctor About Women's Health

At Lena we believe that there is nothing more important than our health, but we recognise that getting the right help can be challenging, especially for women. We're often dismissed, our pain is often minimised and we're sent away feeling like we're overreacting or it's all in our heads.

It's time to change that. Today, we're giving you the tools to advocate clearly, strongly and confidently for yourself. Because you deserve the answers that you went looking for.

A survey by Endometriosis UK found that one in four women with endometriosis reported visiting their doctor up to 20 times before the condition was even suspected. Sadly, this pattern is not unique to endometriosis, we see it across women's health from Fibroids to Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder. We're expected to simply get on with it - pain, bleeding, symptoms that disrupt our lives.

We believe that women deserve far better than the current system and we believe that progress comes in two parts: healthcare professionals taking women seriously, and giving people the tools to advocate for their own health.

It's important to recognise this as a system-wide failure. Whilst we can feel let down by individual doctors or nurses, it's a societal problem that women's health has been chronically underfunded and under-researched. The system has failed women for a very long time.

Tracking Your Symptoms

In your first consultation, your doctor or practitioner is likely to ask about the pattern of these symptoms: how often do they occur, what seems to trigger them, if anything makes them better etc. If you don't have this data, it is likely that the doctor will send you away in order to collect it over at least 2 menstrual cycles.

So to save yourself time, I recommend getting yourself a separate diary specifically for tracking your cycle and symptoms. This may seem like a lot of time and energy, but investing in your gynaecological and reproductive health is priceless. When asked by friends or clients, these are the things I recommend tracking each day, for at least two menstrual cycles:

Your cycle: When did your period start, how long did it last, the colour of the blood (light, bright, dark red), any spotting during the cycle, any clots larger than 2cm and the total length of the cycle. If you track your temperature, you can use this to see if you've ovulated - this is also very useful information.
Pain of any sort (pain in your womb, abdomen, chest, back, legs, head, eyes, anywhere), the intensity of the pain (0-10 scale for severity, 0 being nothing and 10 being the worst pain you've felt), what helped the pain (painkillers, hot water bottles, herbs, remedies) and if it prevented you from doing your daily activities (work, exercising, sleep, attending social events).
Sleep: Roughly how many hours of sleep did you get, the quality of this sleep and/or any disruptions.
Mood: Did you feel happy, content, confident, productive, tearful, irritable, sad, anxious, angry or full of rage? You can write any and all emotions that you felt that day, or just the overall feeling of the day.
Energy levels: Did you feel bright and productive, or did you feel excessively tired and didn't want to get out of bed?
Libido: Changes in your sex drive throughout the month are totally normal! Make sure to make a note if you notice any changes that you're concerned about or you want to discuss with your doctor.
Life events/stress: If you had a particularly stressful day, you were unwell or you experienced something, you can also add this to add context for the symptoms you experienced.

Other extras: if you use a Mira device or another hormone tracking device, you can record any hormone levels too.

The extent to which you track the above will depend on the symptoms you are experiencing. For example if your chief complaint is pain, you can focus on this, but it's still important to give your doctor as much information as possible so that they can make the best management plan. I know that's a huge list, but tracking your symptoms and cycle will give you the best possible chance of getting a full, clear picture of your gynaecological health.

It's also important to write things down that you think are significant - because if it matters to you, it's worth investigating.

Do Your Own Research

As a former doctor myself, I am the first to admit that we really don't know everything. When a patient brings their own ideas and research to the table, it can be incredibly useful and it may remind the doctor of something they might be forgetting.

It's not just about bringing this information to the appointment, it's about building your own understanding of what is (or could be) going on in your body. There is so much information out there that you can use to learn about your cycle,

If you'd like to learn more about specific women's health issues, we recommend checking out our other blog posts for information, resources and interviews. You can find these below:

Bring A Comprehensive Family History

This is one of the most important factors when we're building the overall picture of your health and any risk factors you might have. If you are able to, asking your mother, sisters, aunties, grandmothers and female cousins about their gynaecological and reproductive health is incredibly useful. Certain conditions are inherited, so it's important that we understand if there is anything in your family.

Make a note if anyone in your family has a history of:

Gestational diabetes or pre-eclampsia during pregnancy
Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder (PMDD)
PCOS
Endometriosis or Adenomyosis
Autoimmune diseases including lupus, rheumatoid arthritis, thyroid conditions or multiple sclerosis
Fibroids
Cancer (breast, ovarian, endometrial, cervical, uterine)
Ovarian cysts
Mental health conditions including depression, anxiety and bipolar disorder
Fertility challenges or recurrent miscarriage
Blood clotting disorders such as Factor V Leiden
Other conditions including diabetes, heart failure, stroke and any others you think could be relevant.

Knowing Your Rights (Jess's Rule)

Jess's Rule is a new NHS policy, in memory of Jessica Brady, a 27-year-old who died in December 2020 after more than twenty GP appointments failed to identify her illness until it was too late. Despite repeatedly seeking help, she was eventually diagnosed with stage 4 adenocarcinoma, but only after seeking private healthcare. By then, there was no available treatment. Her family campaigned tirelessly so that no one else would face the same fate.

Introduced in September 2025, Jess's Rule means that if a GP sees a patient three times without identifying a diagnosis, or if symptoms are getting worse, they are now required to stop and think again. In practice this means arranging a face-to-face appointment if previous consultations were remote, conducting a thorough physical examination, ordering additional tests, seeking a second opinion from a colleague, or referring you to a specialist.

For women who have spent years being told their pain is normal, this rule matters. If you have attended your GP three or more times about the same unresolved concern, you can ask directly: what is the next step? You are entitled to an answer.

Don't Accept "It's Normal" If It Doesn't Feel Normal

Nobody knows your body better than you. If you have symptoms that stop you from functioning, bleeding that requires changing your pad, tampon or menstrual cup every hour, or you have mood changes that are affecting your relationships, this is not normal - and it needs to be investigated.

More Resources

We're really just scratching the surface, so we wanted to give you some more resources that will equip you with the skills to advocate for yourself in situations where you feel unheard or dismissed. Try reading any of the following:

It's All In Your Head: True Stories of Imaginary Illness — Suzanne O'Sullivan A neurologist explores the complex relationship between mind and body, and how so many women's physical symptoms are dismissed as psychological.
Doing Harm: The Truth About How Bad Medicine and Lazy Science Leave Women Dismissed, Misdiagnosed, and Sick — Maya Dusenbery A meticulously researched investigation into how the medical establishment has systematically failed women, from research bias to dismissal of pain.
Pain and Prejudice: A Call to Arms for Women and Their Bodies — Gabrielle Jackson Written by a journalist with endometriosis, this book explores how women's pain has been ignored and minimised throughout medical history and what needs to change.
Unwell Women: A Journey Through Medicine and Myth in a Man-Made World — Elinor Cleghorn A sweeping historical account of how women's bodies and illnesses have been misunderstood, pathologised and dismissed from ancient times to the present day.
Ask Me About My Uterus: A Quest to Make Doctors Believe in Women's Pain — Abby Norman A deeply personal account of one woman's decade-long struggle to get an endometriosis diagnosis, woven together with a broader investigation into how women's reproductive pain is routinely dismissed.

We hope you've enjoyed reading this and have learned something new about advocating for yourself during your gynaecological appointments. Remember, you know when something isn't right and you deserve to be taken seriously.

If you feel like you aren't being listened to, you can use the tools and rights listed here to make your case, and you are allowed to switch doctors if you feel like you need someone else.

Written and edited by Dr Rachel Denham, a trained medic and Women's Health Practitioner, who has worked across the charity and humanitarian sector and now specialises in women's health. Rachel is the creator of Bloody Nora, a women's health and wellbeing zine that fuses storytelling, art and science.

Sources:

https://www.endometriosis-uk.org/diagnosis-report